John D. Zoller, JD. CDFA
A litigated divorce is like crossing the country on a donkey. Your baggage weighs down the donkey. It frequently can’t carry you plus your baggage, so you have to walk sometimes. It’s a long way and the speed is the same – about 4 miles an hour. It takes a really long time. The sun and the rain, snow in the mountains, heat in the desert, steep hills and terrifying traffic make the journey very arduous. There is no saddle on your donkey, you rub back and forth, up and down on the donkey’s spine for 2,000 miles. You will chafe, get sore and need lots of salve. You might have to change donkeys along the way. You stop often to rest, eat and drink. The donkey stops more often than you want to stop. When you finally arrive at your destination you are exhausted, depleted and collapse into a lousy bed in a cheap motel to recover.
When you Collaborate, you make the trip in 4 hours on a 21st Century jetliner. You might even choose the first-class cabin as an option. Your baggage, even extra bags, are stowed in the cargo hold below. You travel above all the bad weather. The flight crew is there to assist you, protect your safety and make your journey as pleasant as possible. You arrive feeling excited, refreshed and ready for the next leg of your journey.
In one week in June 2020 I finalized three matters via video conferences. We had two elected Judges and one Private Judge. The parties, though not wealthy, chose to fly first class. They resolved their differences amicably and achieved solutions that served their interests. In one case, the couple sat together on a couch during their divorce hearing.
The Gladiator Paradigm is for fools on donkeys.